Surrender and Transform

“When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind, and fearless.” — Byron Katie

I’m a social gospel Christian with a commitment to shaping the healing and justice of this world.  What’s to value in a statement that urges us to stop “opposing reality”?  Byron Katie’s signature book has a dreadfully powerful title:  Loving What Is.

On my journey of recent years (as a person… as a partner… as a pastor… as a spiritual life coach) I am learning more intensely than ever the paradoxical liberation of surrender.  Far from giving up power, it releases in us the Truest power.  In other places, Byron talks about ceasing to “argue with reality.”  To me, this has come to mean the discipline required to not judge the NOW and to cultivate the self-knowing required to deeply understand what is causing so much discomfort about the current reality.  This —  not reflexive impulses of overwhelm or retaliation — is the doorway to wise power.

Here’s one justice example…

I cannot spiritually engage racism if I do not accept it’s reality.  That seems straightforward enough.  But what about the next step?  I am limited in my efforts to spiritually engage racism if I do not accept – without judging and ill will — those people who see their world through its limiting and cruel lens?  I am limited in my efforts to spiritually engage racism if I do not accept and appreciate that our starting point is a grand and delicious illusion that obscures the workings of systems of racism. I am limited in my efforts to spiritually engage racism if I cannot accept the ways that systemic racism lives in and benefits me.

I am called to my part in the webs of transformation, and I pray for the grace to be simple, fluid, kind and fearless.   When I stop making reality my enemy, I can truly step in as an actor seeking the Divine Big Picture.  And, I might actually make a difference.

Check out more info about Byron at her website:

Learn more about Energy Leadership principles undergirding my coaching work with activists and clergy at




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